Another Dream

I've not dreamt her
maybe for four years
the four shared years
with the other her.

But the other's past
and she's back
She's at my back
She's back at last

She serves up lies
Her mind crimes
During Sleep time
viewed by shut eyes

How is it that she...
She's still inside me?

And she's back
with a surname change
Rend or Rench
Remembering names
From within the almost
Well, I almost didn't
You know, remember
But I did
And both are suitable
Subconscious play
Perhaps or
psychic note

I find myself drawn.
A fierce animal tug
I am impotent
and I am silent

she's counting votes
and someone has won
by one
and she has to explain
about a recount
which she does
with BBC'ness
That commonwealth
correctness
And as she holds
The eyes
Of All present
In her soft
Heart Stopping hand
Rolling them like marbles
Like Chinese balls
I find myself 
frozen
not knowing if
she has seen me
and so
I'm floor bound
and shrinking away

she's a radio show host
has to be in for
a 5am broadcast
one letter and her advice
Delivered by her
open mouth
To an awakening
She is close to being
The voice of god

how did she get that
The god thing
The radio being

and she has a fair few
Acting gigs,
small parts but
It's a start and
Who knows where
She'll end up.
She does.
She always has

I saw her being filmed
in a taxi
for something
maybe eastenders
and she looks divine
I don't mean wow
I mean glowing
From within, her
Translucent skin
Displaying the power
Of
ultra cool
and I have love
for her
and envy of the others
those who now feed her
And feed on her.
she's made it
she's almost famous
after all
she did want to so be
the most attractive
the most desired
and she's there

the car drives past me
and I can see her smiling
at the man sat next to her
she hasn't seen me
she never sees me now
I am a ghost
fading fast
a shadow in time
a few minutes
to midday

for her
in am... I am...
Tick tock
tick tock

I am not.